Advice – Spaghetti Sexual

Updated: Oct 31, 2020

Courtney here again… hope you guys don’t mind. There’s lots of talk about sexuality in the swinging community nowadays, especially in this time of increasing acceptance of fluidity. We’ve found that the incidence of completely straight ladies on swinging dating sites is quite low. There are several possible reasons, some good some bad. We ladies each have our own reasons for our behaviors including me!

So, let’s start with bad reasons that ladies might not be straight in the swinging world. First off, there are women who put on a show. They know that men, in general, get turned on by a couple of hot ladies fooling around. In some ways this seems noble in that they are performing to please their male partners.

However, if you peel that back just a bit, no woman should be performing sexual acts for any reason beyond that they are happy with the activity. We’ve seen this many times when a lady turns to her partner and says, “watch this!” What follows is a shallow licking of nipples or play-acting kissing that does nothing for either lady besides knowing that their man is turned on.

There’s nothing worse than a lady flailing her tongue around, extended way out from her mouth, with her eyes open and focused on her man. How do you kiss that? It’s just awkward doing a bit of tongue touching and occasional uncomfortable lip locks all for the sake of getting the men hard… Ladies, they will get hard soon enough! There isn’t any need to do things you don’t feel like doing normally.

Much worse are the couples where the male half pushes the lady to do bisexual activities. There is nothing worse (well there are a couple) than hearing a man say, “honey, give her a kiss, come on!” The lady turns to you and you can see in her eyes that she is absolutely uncomfortable and doesn’t have a bisexual bone in her body. She leans in from the waist to keep her vagina as far away as possible and sticks her lips out in the familiar duck face kissy pose from 2018 selfies. What do you do with that?

We’ve gotten really good at letting women off the hook who are being pressured into bisexual play. I give Alex “the look” and he intercedes. Usually he takes charge and moves the play to more guy on girl activity and the ladies are relieved to have a dick to suck instead of a nipple. Alex doesn’t seem to mind either.

I, myself am spaghetti sexual. A friend of ours in the lifestyle introduced us to the term and we’ve used it ever since. The correct term is actually, “situationally bisexual.” But, spaghetti sexual really sums it up. I’m as strait as a piece of dry spaghetti all day every day. I would never look at a lady and think, “I’d love to lick that out!” I do, however, recognize a sexy woman but, there isn’t a burning in my loins and sudden rush of heat to my cheeks as there is with a stunning man.

But, in the passion of group play I’ve found out that I can get very bisexual due to the heated hyper-sexuality of the situation. Like a piece of spaghetti, when I get hot and wet, I tend to bend and not be very straight. The first time this happened I was shocked at my own reactions.


Our first couple to play with had a female half who was 100% bisexual and really wanted me. I had no idea as I hadn’t learned to read those type of signals. Her husband was licking me out and Alex was banging her doggy style when she edged her way over and began sucking my nipples.

The shock of the sudden forbidden pleasure was electric. She was rough with my sensitive nipples and, where the men had been fairly carful, bit down with abandon. Most times, that would have been a no no! But, when close to orgasm, on occasion, that drives me nuts. I must have terrified her screaming in her ear and grabbing handfuls of her hair, shoving her down on my boobs! Alex said I nearly passed out.

Later in the session I was in the reverse position except Alex was pumping away at me in doggy and she was on her back with her man pumping away on her. Suddenly there was the crazy desire to help her orgasm grow to the super nova that mine had just been. I leaned down and her large dark nipple loomed into sight. I couldn’t believe what I was doing as I sucked in a mass of silky breast skin along with the firm hard, almost rough, dark nipple. I loved the feel and it sent me into an immediate orgasm due to the craziness of the action.

If I remember correctly, it sent the entire group into orgasm within seconds of each other. I couldn’t fathom what had come over me. And, when later in the week, I saw a sexy woman and didn’t feel attraction, I was confused. Was I bisexual? Suppressed lesbian? What was I?

Luckily, Alex isn’t above googling things about bisexual women… pervert! We found the term situationally bisexual and the definition fit perfectly to what I had felt. When the situation got out of control, super sexy, hot… I could play bisexual without any reservation. The fact that Alex enjoyed the awesome sets of positions available to couples with women playing bisexual was just an added bonus!

Have any of you done the real Eiffel Tower position? The ladies go into a sixty-nine and the men go to either end and bang away. The high-five the men make above the writhing women makes the top of the tower. It’s harder for the lady on top, as the top of her head bumps the man on her end’s stomach while the lady on bottom’s head fits easily between the spread legs of the other man. However, when done well, this is one lava hot position.

We’ve even had a three way on occasion with ladies. The first time, I was super apprehensive as I knew that bisexual activity would be part of the expected play. Not being in the situation I had time to worry about how things would play out and stress over not being turned on by the thought of a naked woman.

However, an hour later I was face to vagina for the first time ever. I was near orgasm from my husband grinding against me in doggy and the lady positioned herself on her back in front of me, using her hands, she guided my face down to her vagina.

There it was, folds halfway open, glistening. I closed my eyes and reached out with my tongue and felt the silky-smooth texture. I moaned with the lighting crash situation and found myself buried against her, sucking hard on her clitoris, feeling the wet run down my chin, tasting her floral and sea salt flavor; the powerful strokes of my husband causing me to scream with my mouth full of lady parts.

Where was I going with all of this? I don’t know, I lost track in the funky memories. Oh yeah, examine your motives for bisexual play. Don’t do things you don’t want to do. And, if you as a woman, find yourself doing bisexual things you never thought possible while in the heat of a crazy encounter, you might just be lucky enough to be spaghetti sexual.


(Yes, that's me on the floor in the picture below!)




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