27. Pub Quiz

A few weeks later Bob and Molly invited us to attend a pub quiz at their local on a Thursday evening. Courtney liked the idea of spending some time with our swinging partners without having the added pressure of knowing we were about to get naked. So, without much ado we cleared our schedule popped a ready-made lasagna in the oven for the kids and headed out the door.


The pub was warm and inviting with an inner glow of friendship and shared laughter pouring out the windows into the dark car park. Courtney checked her make up one last time in the car’s passenger side visor mirror and decided to use a brush to smooth out already perfect hair. I waited, impatiently.

Bob and Molly were at the Bar when we walked in. Bob was not in his swinging boots but regular black loafers, a loud Hawaiian shirt with a pineapple print under a black Superdry jacket and jeans. Molly hugged Courtney and then pressed her firm breasts on me too with a hearty hug. She was wearing black Doc Martin’s, tight jeans with a metal link belt, and a tucked in pink shirt that threatened to explode with cleavage.

Bob added my bitter and Courtney’s coffee to his order and then let us know that they already had a table picked out as the tables went fast on quiz night. Molly and Courtney headed off to the table while Bob and I carried over the drinks over. I noticed that the tray Bob carried had another bitter and an extra glass of white wine and I wondered who they were for.

Inside the pub was warm to the point that I soon regretted Bob’s pick of tables near the open fire. Courtney and I shed our jackets and I wished that I hadn’t worn a long-sleeved dress shirt. Courtney looked comfortable in her jeans and a blue asymmetrical top that had one short sleeve and one shoulder bare.

Sitting at the table was a super young version of Molly in her early 20s wearing a short dress along with a tag along boyfriend in skinny jeans and a hoodie that made me sweat just looking at it.

Bob sat the Guinness in front of the young man who thanked him in a decidedly PE1 Peterborough accent. His “thanks brother” sounded like “fanks bruv.” I cringed. Bob sat the glass of wine in front of what had to be Molly’s daughter and then confirmed it, “Guys this is Molly’s daughter Ann and her boyfriend Darren.”

“Very nice to meet you,” Courtney reached across to shake her hand while I gave the young man a wave from across the table.

“These are Mom’s friends we met the other day in the park. I think we mentioned them to you,” Molly provided the cover story.

“Which park was that?” Ann asked her mother with arched eyebrows.

“The Burghley House grounds,” Bob added smoothly. “We had to share a table in the Orangery restaurant as it was full and ended up making new friends out of it.”

“That’s right, we actually ended up sharing a high tea,” Courtney embellished.

Ann pursed her lips and rubbed her nose, “interesting, that’s a really convenient way to meet.”

I kept my mouth shut sensing that anything I might add would just sound even more false. Thankfully, the quiz masters came around passing out answer sheets and selling raffle tickets for various prizes. I bought a couple of tickets in support of some local charity and Molly and Courtney huddled over the dingbats page.

The first question the figured our had the word “wheel” written four times in a stack next to the word “drive.” I didn’t need to help as the ladies immediately wrote four-wheel drive. The following one was the word Bob written twice, one above the other. Ann and her boyfriend seemed uninterested in helping and kept to their end of the table.

“Oh, I’ve got it,” Bob said about the Bob question. He looked at me with a mischievous smile, “imagine the top of Molly’s head as seen from above.”

Courtney laughed out loud as she got it, I still was mulling over the question and Molly was staring at me with a twinkle in her eyes, “You know Alex, bobbing up and down.” She patted my knee under the table.

I felt the eyes of Ann on me and played it as cool as possible. “You guys are good at this.”

“Oh yes we are,” Courtney said giving Molly a high-five and I had to smile at the double entendre.

The next few rounds were called out over a microphone and the pub quieted down significantly. However, Courtney along with Bob and Molly kept up their veiled innuendos leaving me extremely uncomfortable and worried that Ann would put two and two together. After all we were at a quiz and everyone was in a solving puzzle type of mood.

Ann kept up her looks my direction and they seemed to be judging me and finding me wanting. I was, hot from being too close to the fire and the sweat on my brow was surely because of that and not the searing glances from Ann. When would this quiz end!

Courtney asked me, “are you alright honey? You look a little hot and bothered.” The ladies laughed together and I knew I was blushing.

The round ended with, “What is dermatophobia the fear of?” And I guessed it had to do something with skin and we almost went with, “showing too much skin,” as an answer to which Molly said, “is that possible?” and winked at my slyly.

“No, I think it’s the fear of skin disease,” Bob corrected us. And, he was right. We passed our answer sheets to a nearby table and took theirs to score the answers and we ended up only missing two on the first round. The next round we got 100% on the sports question category all due to Bob’s inexhaustible knowledge of rugby.

We were ahead by three questions going into the final question which was worth 10 points. The question was, “How many of Henry VIII’s wives were called Anne?

“Well it can’t be more than six,” Bob said. “But, that’s all I can remember at the moment. I blame the beer.” He drained his bitter to emphasize his point.

Ann looked up from chatting quietly with her boyfriend and said, “ Catherine of Aragon, Anne Boleyn, Jane Seymour, Anne of Cleves, Catherine Howard and Catherine Parr. So, the answer is two. Oh, and – annulled, executed, died, divorced, executed, widowed.”

“Impressive!” Molly said smiling at her daughter. With Ann’s help on the Anne question and Bob’s getting the Bob question we sailed to easy victory and a free round at the pub. All in all, despite the constant worry over Ann guessing at our intimate relationship with her mother and stepfather, the night was a success and quite fun.

We men shook hands and then hugged and gave chaste cheek kisses to the ladies along with our goodbye to Ann and Darren as they were walking off to Darren’s apartment. We hung out a few minutes more in the car park allowing the young couple to get out of sight.

“That was awkward for me!” I said. “Ann is sharp and I was worried the entire time that you guys were going to give us away with all the innuendo.”

Bob laughed and so did Molly, “she knows,” Molly said. “We told her a while ago but we aren’t telling Darren which is why we gave the cover story.”

This didn’t make me feel any better as I now understood that Ann had been staring at me thinking about how I was having sex with her mother!




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